Thursday, February 19, 2009
No more what ifs
It's time to stop being afraid, stop procrastinating, stop wondering - and start doing. We don't have time to wonder "what if" anymore. It would be so much better to live your life knowing you did everything you could to make yourself happy and fulfill all your hopes, dreams and desires. No one wants to look back and have regrets or wonder what would have happened if i did this or that. If it is realistic and reasonable, I say go for it. That doesn't mean just do things because you want to do them and have no regard for the people in your life - no. I mean if it ain't hurting nobody and like the song says" "If it makes you happy - then it couldn't be that bad.." (drugs, alcohol, crime and destructive or violent behavior excluded). I mean, why wait? I'm not. Not anymore. I'm doing it.
Monday, January 12, 2009
New year - new attitude.....sike!
Do you ever just like to be mean to certain people? Like you really get pleasure out of being a smart ass to them? I do. I love it. Especially when that person has already pissed you off and they don't even know you're pissed. Then they have no idea why you are being so mean to them! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! I love it.
I think I mentioned it once before that it's so much easier to be mean than it is to be nice, and it still rings true as ever! I give up on being nice this month. Maybe next month with Valentine's day and all the love floating around, I might try harder. I'm on vacation for now though. People suck and they need to be told how much.
I think I mentioned it once before that it's so much easier to be mean than it is to be nice, and it still rings true as ever! I give up on being nice this month. Maybe next month with Valentine's day and all the love floating around, I might try harder. I'm on vacation for now though. People suck and they need to be told how much.
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
New begininngs
So the end of the year is here. Let me reflect on 2008......
- Got a new baby cousin
- Left one job
- Got a different job
- Went to Miami (again)
- Got engaged!
- Racked up hundreds of miles on my car driving up and down the east coast (well only like 4 states)
So all in all, it was a good year. What 2009 has in store, only God knows - but I'm ready. Happy new year yall.
- Got a new baby cousin
- Left one job
- Got a different job
- Went to Miami (again)
- Got engaged!
- Racked up hundreds of miles on my car driving up and down the east coast (well only like 4 states)
So all in all, it was a good year. What 2009 has in store, only God knows - but I'm ready. Happy new year yall.
Friday, October 17, 2008
Choices
We all have so many choices to make everyday - no wonder we're always stressed. I've tried to live by the mantra "It's not that serious", but it can't be like that ALL the time, right? I mean, I have a holistic point of view when it comes to most things - and in the big picture we live, we die and whatever is in between is up to us. Unfortunately my laid back attitude sometimes takes a break and I end up freaking out about something small, when really "it's not that serious".
My job: Yesterday for example, I made a mistake at work - wasn't that big of a deal, but I just hate doing something wrong. Why did I want to cry? I mean, I wasn't getting fired - nobody was complaining to my boss, so why did I feel like my world was about to crumble? I think I lack an emotional balance that is needed sometimes, and when I'm off balance, it's not a pretty sight. I really have to get it under control and choose when it's ok to be upset and when it's not.
My relationship: I'm newly engaged - and of course everybody knows. People at work know, and I have only been working at this particular site for 2.5 months now, so they only know what's on the surface when it comes to me. So this one lady I worked with called herself being helpful and gave me a wedding checklist and a wedding planning book. I thought that was really sweet. I didn't have the heart to tell her that I probably wouldn't need all that, so I just thanked her graciously. Then my manager, the lady, and I start talking about babies (the lady is having a baby in January). She nearly gave my manager a heart attack when she almost insinuated that I was with child (I just took over for a woman going on maternity leave, so she's hoping I'll be here for a hot minute at least). I told her to relax, I'm not having a baby yet. So the lady says "Yeah, we gotta get her another ring first! Not until AFTER the wedding." And my manager says "Well...not necessarily. Sometimes these things happen before!" And the lady says "No, I don't think she's like that - she seems like the planning type and won't let that happen." Ummm - wow. On the one hand, I was glad my manager had a realistic and modern view about the situation, and on the other hand I'm like ok...so now if I have a baby before I have a wedding, I already know how this other lady is going to look at me - thanks. When did it become ok to talk about my personal choices for my life and relationship at work? This is why I stay to myself.
My time: I have always had a selfish streak in me. I also have a very generous part of me too. Sometimes I give too much and want to do too much and who ends up suffering in the end...me. I have a full time job, I'm in school, I have family, friends and a fiance. Splitting my time between all of those areas as well as finding time to myself has been hard. I think back to when I lived alone in FL and only had a few things on my plate - those were good times. Sometimes I may have had TOO much time on my hands, but I don't know what's better - too much time to yourself, or not enough? I am looking forward to taking a vacation and relaxing. Everyday I have something to do - there's never a moment when I can say "I have nothing else I could be doing right now". Unfortunately, I don't think this will be changing any time soon. The only thing that is going away is school and that won't happen for a few more years. School will most likely be replaced by a baby - so my personal "me" time is pretty much on hold until retirement.
You know what I realized about choices though - nobody had all the answers and everybody needs to do what's best for them. For the most part, we're all good, smart people. You shouldn't beat yourself up for making a bad choice. I think that smart people do stupid things, stupid people do stupid things over and over again.
My job: Yesterday for example, I made a mistake at work - wasn't that big of a deal, but I just hate doing something wrong. Why did I want to cry? I mean, I wasn't getting fired - nobody was complaining to my boss, so why did I feel like my world was about to crumble? I think I lack an emotional balance that is needed sometimes, and when I'm off balance, it's not a pretty sight. I really have to get it under control and choose when it's ok to be upset and when it's not.
My relationship: I'm newly engaged - and of course everybody knows. People at work know, and I have only been working at this particular site for 2.5 months now, so they only know what's on the surface when it comes to me. So this one lady I worked with called herself being helpful and gave me a wedding checklist and a wedding planning book. I thought that was really sweet. I didn't have the heart to tell her that I probably wouldn't need all that, so I just thanked her graciously. Then my manager, the lady, and I start talking about babies (the lady is having a baby in January). She nearly gave my manager a heart attack when she almost insinuated that I was with child (I just took over for a woman going on maternity leave, so she's hoping I'll be here for a hot minute at least). I told her to relax, I'm not having a baby yet. So the lady says "Yeah, we gotta get her another ring first! Not until AFTER the wedding." And my manager says "Well...not necessarily. Sometimes these things happen before!" And the lady says "No, I don't think she's like that - she seems like the planning type and won't let that happen." Ummm - wow. On the one hand, I was glad my manager had a realistic and modern view about the situation, and on the other hand I'm like ok...so now if I have a baby before I have a wedding, I already know how this other lady is going to look at me - thanks. When did it become ok to talk about my personal choices for my life and relationship at work? This is why I stay to myself.
My time: I have always had a selfish streak in me. I also have a very generous part of me too. Sometimes I give too much and want to do too much and who ends up suffering in the end...me. I have a full time job, I'm in school, I have family, friends and a fiance. Splitting my time between all of those areas as well as finding time to myself has been hard. I think back to when I lived alone in FL and only had a few things on my plate - those were good times. Sometimes I may have had TOO much time on my hands, but I don't know what's better - too much time to yourself, or not enough? I am looking forward to taking a vacation and relaxing. Everyday I have something to do - there's never a moment when I can say "I have nothing else I could be doing right now". Unfortunately, I don't think this will be changing any time soon. The only thing that is going away is school and that won't happen for a few more years. School will most likely be replaced by a baby - so my personal "me" time is pretty much on hold until retirement.
You know what I realized about choices though - nobody had all the answers and everybody needs to do what's best for them. For the most part, we're all good, smart people. You shouldn't beat yourself up for making a bad choice. I think that smart people do stupid things, stupid people do stupid things over and over again.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
I wanna pinch their cheeks!
Old people are so cute sometimes! I love when an old person uses a young person term like in IM's or text messages and they say "LOL" or some other acronym that I never used with them for the fear that they wouldn't know WTF I was talking about. I think it's adorable. And it makes me respect them a little more - like "ok, you're not completely out-of-date!" Like when Tim Gunn was taught the phrase "Holla at cha boy" I loved when he said it! This older, white, gay, stiff man saying "Holler at ya boy!" - it's hilarious!
On the other hand, old people are NOT so cute when they try to be your friend - and they should be friends with people their own age, like closer to my parents age! Why is this man at work trying to befriend me and I'm like ewww. I mean, I know old men still think they can get it poppin with younger women (cuz some women like that) but I am not one. So this man at work keeps calling me and IM'ing me and I'm like "uuuhhhh, sir please stop." This is how our last convo went on the phone:
Me: Hell-o?
Him: Hey - yeah so I'm taking a few days off so I won't see you for awhile.
Me: Oh ok.
Him: Yeah, I need some rest. These folks in here tryna run me around all crazy.
Me: Mmhmm.
Him: Yeah, so we'll have to do lunch sometime when I get back next week.
Me: I won't be here.
Him: Ok, well when you get back then.
Me: Actually, I don't go out to lunch. I don't have time.
Him: Oh come on - you gotta make time for lunch! You can't let them work you too hard!
Me: I make time, but I bring my lunch and eat at my desk. I just don't like to go out.
Him: You mean you just don't want to go out with ME. Come on, it's just a co-worker thing!
Me: No it's not that. I just don't want to.
Him: Look, I just like hanging with cool people. I mean, it's not like that - don't you know I'm married!? And I see the ring, I ain't tryna cross no boundaries!
Me: *thinking to myself - "yeah you're married, but I bet she's not a PYT like me old perv"*
Yeah, I know I just don't want to.
Him: Ok then, I'll talk to you later.
I don't want to talk to him at all. I try to be as standoffish as I can without being outright rude, but it's about to get ugly.
On the other hand, old people are NOT so cute when they try to be your friend - and they should be friends with people their own age, like closer to my parents age! Why is this man at work trying to befriend me and I'm like ewww. I mean, I know old men still think they can get it poppin with younger women (cuz some women like that) but I am not one. So this man at work keeps calling me and IM'ing me and I'm like "uuuhhhh, sir please stop." This is how our last convo went on the phone:
Me: Hell-o?
Him: Hey - yeah so I'm taking a few days off so I won't see you for awhile.
Me: Oh ok.
Him: Yeah, I need some rest. These folks in here tryna run me around all crazy.
Me: Mmhmm.
Him: Yeah, so we'll have to do lunch sometime when I get back next week.
Me: I won't be here.
Him: Ok, well when you get back then.
Me: Actually, I don't go out to lunch. I don't have time.
Him: Oh come on - you gotta make time for lunch! You can't let them work you too hard!
Me: I make time, but I bring my lunch and eat at my desk. I just don't like to go out.
Him: You mean you just don't want to go out with ME. Come on, it's just a co-worker thing!
Me: No it's not that. I just don't want to.
Him: Look, I just like hanging with cool people. I mean, it's not like that - don't you know I'm married!? And I see the ring, I ain't tryna cross no boundaries!
Me: *thinking to myself - "yeah you're married, but I bet she's not a PYT like me old perv"*
Yeah, I know I just don't want to.
Him: Ok then, I'll talk to you later.
I don't want to talk to him at all. I try to be as standoffish as I can without being outright rude, but it's about to get ugly.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Purpose Driven Life
What is your purpose in life? What motivates you to get up in the morning, go to work, do your job, stay healthy, etc.?
I read that book - A Purpose Driven Life - and it was pretty good. Living a Christian life and getting closer to God was basically the purpose it said we should have, and that's great. But I'm curious to know what some other motivating factors may be for people. I know some people have goals they want to achieve, children they want to raise, lives they want to save. I think I'm asking because I'm still looking for my purpose. Maybe that is just part of life's journey - finding your purpose; but I don't want to be 85 and wake up one day and say "OH - THAT'S what I should have been striving for my whole life!" Ya know? I kinda want to figure it out sooner than later - another day is not promised.
I read that book - A Purpose Driven Life - and it was pretty good. Living a Christian life and getting closer to God was basically the purpose it said we should have, and that's great. But I'm curious to know what some other motivating factors may be for people. I know some people have goals they want to achieve, children they want to raise, lives they want to save. I think I'm asking because I'm still looking for my purpose. Maybe that is just part of life's journey - finding your purpose; but I don't want to be 85 and wake up one day and say "OH - THAT'S what I should have been striving for my whole life!" Ya know? I kinda want to figure it out sooner than later - another day is not promised.
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